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Cordy Grrr

xlivvielockex in still_grrr

Prompt 010 Ficlet

Title: We Got Ourself A Sheriff And His Name's Bobby Joe
Author xlivvielockex
Rating PG
Word Count 573
Prompt 010: Your Town
Characters/Pairing (if any) ATS Ensemble
A/N Not up for voting. As some of you know, I've lived in about half a dozen cities all over the world. They are all "my town" so I just picked the one I am in right now. It's more fun that way. LOL (Bonus points to whoever knows what song the title and cut text are from!)



“I swear Angel, if I step in a pile of horse...poo, you are buying me a new pair of shoes.” Cordelia said as she narrowly avoided one of the aforementioned steaming piles. Good thing it was evening and it was cool or she would have ended up ankle deep in shit.

“Cordelia, please. We are trying to retain some element of surprise in this mission.” Wesley chided her. “You are going to scare away this death cult with your shouting. Really now...” He stopped suddenly as he felt his foot press and squish into something soft, warm, and not all together pleasant smelling. His nose wrinkled up in disgust. He tried to wipe his shoe off on the half dead and chewed grass of the grazing field.

Cordelia kept her voice to a low hiss. “I don’t know why these death cults can’t just stick to L.A. or the Hellmouth. Why did they have to take up residence in bumheck, Arizona?! And why did The Powers have to send me a skull splitting vision of it? This town had a funky smell in the vision, it has a funky smell now.”

Angel turned to look at both of them. He was working his jaw muscles and his brow was heavily creased. He was brooding over their childish back and forth. “Because, this town is about forty five minutes away from a very powerful convergence of mystical energies. That is why.”

Cordelia merely rolled her eyes at the vampire, who was avoiding the piles of dung among the grass quite nicely. Damn his vampire powers! She wanted that one. The ability to avoid steaming piles. It would come in handy dating in L.A. “Then they should go to this magically convergenty thing and let the people up there take care of it. Oh wait, I remember now.” Cordelia added as Angel shot her another look, “it was too expensive up there. Gotcha.”

“If you guys don’t mind, would like to find this cult, take care of them, and get back someplace where I am not the only brother within a hundred mile radius.” Gunn added from his position in the rear. “And some place where the crackers don’t carry handguns into the Taco Bell.” He said under his breath.

“I don’t know how people can live like this. There isn’t a mall for two hours. And the nearest movie theater is two screens and thirty minutes away. These people are crazy.” Cordelia said once more as they approached a grouping of trailers. “They don’t even have paved roads in half the town!”

Angel shot Cordelia another look in the hopes it would quiet her. It seemed to have the opposite affect. Instead she just grinned at Angel.

“Hey, when this is all over, at least you can get some really fresh pig’s blood! Like belly up, straight to the hog.” Cordelia paused though as she spotted something glowing in the distance to the right of the trailers where the cult was holed up. She broke away from the group, heading towards it. It was calling to her, urging her forward.

“Where the hell is Barbie going now?” Gunn asked, looking to Wesley.

Wesley called out, trying to get her attention as well keep quiet. “Cordelia! CORDELIA!”

She turned around to face the trio of men. “What...I see a beacon of civilization! I didn’t believe it but...they have a Starbucks!”

Comments

Angel turned to look at both of them. He was working his jaw muscles and his brow was heavily creased. He was brooding over their childish back and forth.
Cordelia merely rolled her eyes at the vampire, who was avoiding the piles of dung among the grass quite nicely. Damn his vampire powers! She wanted that one. The ability to avoid steaming piles. It would come in handy dating in L.A.


LMAO. Almost literally.

Seriously, this was a great little piece of interaction. Loved it. Great character voices.
Thanks! You know how much your feedback means to me. I was kind of iffy on the voices, made Sarah look over it just to make sure. It is a whole lot harder to write them in voice and in character in an unfamiliar setting, that is for sure. But I likes the challenge. :)

And any chance to make fun of the one horse town I live in now, I am going to take it!
Hehe, I love the ending where they find a Starbucks. You can't hide from Starbucks! LOL. Very fun ficlet. Everyone is very in character, and yeah, just love it.
Well, there is a Starbucks on every corner in every town in America it seems like. Manchild took me to a corner in Seattle that had a Starbucks at the North, South, East, and West corners. FOUR! At one intersection. It was insane. I have a picture of it someplace.
Very nice one, I loved it.
Thanks! It was definitely a challenge to put the gang in my home town. But I am glad that someone really liked it.
Your hometown is really called Bumheck? :| ;)
OMG no mall what would Cordy do?
What would Cordy do? What would she do? What do I DO?! If it wasn't for online shopping, I would totally go insane here. I have to drive 90 minutes just to get to a decent mall and two hours to get to one that I really love.

It is painful, I tells ya. PAIN-FULL!
Hehe, I have a mall 10 minutes from my house, another 15 minutes from my house, and two more within half an hour.
Cordy Grrr

January 2017

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